


you dialed 00, dumbass

by xinmood



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Drabble, EXCEPT it doesn't appear until it actually happens uwu, M/M, Soulmate AU where they get the first words they'll say tattooed on each other, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, dumbass drunk hanbin calls, he just wanted to nut lol, jinhwan just doing his job, switchboard type, telephone operator jinhwan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 07:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20205817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xinmood/pseuds/xinmood
Summary: Working as a telephone operator wasn't all that exciting to Jinhwan, save for when he got calls from the mob, runaways, and people who were kind enough to wish him a good day and thank him for his help.Today he gets a phone call from a guy who just wanted to bust a nut.essentially just a soulmate AU drabble where Hanbin is drunk and Jinhwan just wants to do his job.





	you dialed 00, dumbass

**Author's Note:**

> everything is angsty on twt so i wrote sumn a little lighthearted and quick for yall mwah. please enjoy x

“Operator, may I help you?”

Jinhwan’s tone was laid-back, melodic. A trait born from months of experience, bred from - ironically - the monotony of what his job demanded. His hands moved like clockwork - from handling the cords of the switchboard in front of him, writing down numbers, to having to speak in a manner so saccharinely sweet it sickened him at times. Some days work was easy. Most of his regular callers were nice, straight to the point - though he did get a few strange phone calls now and then. From people being absolute bigots to callers so paranoid he’d wondered what kind of life they had beyond the phone lines. Were they on the run? Was it a result of some elaborate underground business? He could only muse so much in between the influx of calls that came day-to-day.

Today, Jinhwan received a call that made its own mark in his _ what-the-hell _spectrum.

“H-Hey,” the voice was a little slurred, breathless. _ Another drunk annoyance, _was Jinhwan’s first thought, though he wondered why he felt a little tug in his chest at the quiet voice. 

Until the man spoke again. “Is this- Is this that phone sex hotline?”

Jinhwan blinked. Apparently he blinked for too long. _ What- _

“Uhm, I’m kind of new to this? Your name is Bobby, right?”

_ Oh, wow. He just keeps going, huh. _Jinhwan cleared his throat, ignoring the weird tingling in his forearm. “No sir, this is the operator, direct line. You dialed 00.”

The silence on the other end was _ palpable. _Jinhwan coughed to choke back a wheeze and then schooled his voice into a tone more pleasant, hoping the poor guy wasn’t too embarrassed.

“I’ll get Bobby for you in a second if you have his number with you, no worries.”

“Ah,” hearing that voice was painful. The static crackled while Jinhwan waited patiently until he spoke again. “Sir, I only have the number 00 scribbled on here…”

Jinhwan sat up straighter, pressing his lips into a tight line.

_ I must not laugh. I will not laugh. Keep it together, Kim Jinhwan. _

The fumbling of sheets on the other end had him physically _ shaking. _ Perhaps it was a little mean of him to want to howl and cackle at the poor soul on the line, but imagining the scene made it even worse. _ Oh my god, I’m sick- _

“Ah…” his tone was, abruptly, much more confident. “I… Sir, what do you think of all this?”

Jinhwan perked up a bit at the sudden question, surprised that he would ask him. _ Must’ve been pissed drunk _ … _W__ell, he asked, and it’s only appropriate to answer. _

“In my humble opinion sir, it appears they might’ve bamboozled you.”

The man on the other end sighed so resignedly that Jinhwan started to feel bad for him. “I think you’re right, Mister Operator. I’ve been… b-bambwoozled.” 

Jinhwan cleared his throat - seemed to be doing a lot of that within the span of the call - and nodded his head even though the caller couldn’t see him. He also wondered distantly how in the world someone could believe that the double digit 00 was the number to anything else _ but _ an operator line. Was he just very sheltered or just an idiot? Jinhwan figured it might’ve been a little bit of both.

“Sorry about that, sir. Was there anyone else you’d like to call?”

He figured the man was pondering this with all his alcohol-addled brain - it took another few seconds for him to mumble a quiet “no.” 

“Alright, sir. You have a nice night now, okay?” 

“Un. T-Thank you, Mister Operator,” Jinhwan paused at that, mulling over the nickname. And then he spoke up again, “Thank you, for not laughing at me… and for being nice and, well, yeah.”

_ Jesus, this guy... _Jinhwan felt a smile tug at his lips that unwittingly showed in his pleasant response. “No problem, sir. It happens. Take care, yeah?”

“Yeah… you too.”

“Thank you, sir. Goodnight.”

“Yeah, goodnight,”

“Alright.”

Jinhwan ended the call, his mind buzzing with questions he didn’t know if he wanted the answers to.

_ Lord, I don’t get paid enough for this job, _he sighed, standing from his chair to glance at the clock, only to nearly scream bloody murder when he noticed the strange black lettering that littered his forearm.

He could only stare at the words in wonder and, admittedly, abject horror.

Because written in what looked to be rough chicken scratch across the pale skin of his arm were the woefully familiar words;

_ H-Hey, is this- is this that phone sex hotline? _

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Jinhwan wondered why the universe didn’t bother to rid the sentence (tattooed on HIS skin) of his soulmate’s stuttering. He didn’t even know his name. To this the universe said, _fuck them kids. _
> 
> rip jinhwan...


End file.
